Someone messaged me today and told me that they had some HUGE news – this is it. I guess Kristen Stewart and that creepy guy who plays the vampire in that movie about not having sex are dating. Yeah I was pretty surprised. I always thought that dude wasn’t into ladies and now that I know he is I can finally loosen the strings on my sweatpants. I’m actually quite relieved. I bought these sweatpants to relax in and you really can’t get any relaxation when you have a gay vampire floating around just waiting for the opportunity to ravage you with his vampire dong.

These sweatpants have a picture of a skateboarder on them.

Click here for more pictures of Kristen Stewart at the ELLE Style Awards